= FAVOURITE WORD =
Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge Him,
and He will make your paths straight.
[NIV]
New phase. More changes.
What would the future bring?
Sunday, September 24, 2006
Dreary Weekend
It's been a while since I last blogged. I've been busy marking and setting examination papers. At least I've recovered from my flu and my ankle's getting much better, though I still can't go jogging. Hrmph.
I went for driving lesson yesterday. I'm glad to say that I haven't forgotten how to drive after 4 weeks of MIA. Unfortunately, I can't say the same for my parking. It took me a while to recall how to park. Sigh. Anyway, I enjoyed yesterday's lesson. I drove a lot faster than the last time - hovering between 50-60 km/h along heavy traffic roads and hitting 70 km/h where there were light traffic. Well, since my instructor didn't say anything, I happily stuck to these. I killed the engine three times though. Haha. Still, I had fun. x)
Yesterday was Shouwen's 21st birthday too. My parents came to pick me up after driving lesson and somehow we got lost on our way to the place. I promptly dozed off and when I woke up nearly an hour later, we were still on the road. -_-'' It wasn't until Xiaorong called that we finally figured the way there. Even then, it took us a good 20 minutes. -_-''''
The birthday bash was okay. There were many people around. Most of the time I was catching up with Xiaorong and eating. We left even before we got to eat the cake because the photo-taking took up too much time. By then, it was already almost 10pm, I think.
Other than the driving lesson and the party, the weekend's pretty dreary. I'm actually in the midst of setting the 3NA English papers.
Hm, I think I shall get back to it now. Ciao!
jOyZ blogged at 3:57 PM
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Thursday, September 14, 2006
Marking Machine Malfunctions
In case you're wondering who or what this marking machine is, who else could I be referring to... but myself? Hah.
Yes, I'm malfunctioning.
I was marking until 4am plus Tuesday morning before I finally collapsed into bed... only to be rudely awakened 2 hours later by my brother who coolly said, "Slept at 4plus still have to wake up and go to work what." Fine and well. So I dragged myself up - only to collapse back into bed because my head was throbbing like crazy - I felt like I was being whammed ruthlessly with bricks. How to teach in such a state? -_- I called the school and told Luke I had to see the doctor. Honestly, I think I just needed rest instead of medication.
Strange, isn't it? September holiday ended just a few days ago and I'm already malfunctioning due to exhaustion.
Anyway by the time I got to the doctor's, my nose was acting up as well. I was sneezing with such a flourish that my nose was soon running like a tap. How wonderful - headache AND flu. (Or is it cold? Whatever... I can never differentiate between the two.) The medication made me sleep after lunch though. My nose miraculously stopped running mucus (yeeucks!) and I even regained enough energy to continue marking until 5.30am this morning. Yeah, I still have the headache, but it isn't as unbearable as before. I didn't sleep at all and left for work. Now, you can bet on your bottom dollar the headache's back - full blast again.
And I don't know what I'm doing here. Just grouching I suppose.
Anyway, I still can't sleep. I've got another 2 stacks (2.5 inches thick in all) to complete before I go for work tomorrow. So, it's anyone's guess whether I will stay up working again tonight.
So what am I STILL doing here? I should start my marking marathon like NOW.
I'm... obviously... procrastinating... *tap feet... tap fingers... very very... slowwwwly...*
*yawn*
...
WAHLAU. Let me rot a bit first can? It's like I can't even rest without feeling guilty. Haven't you heard - 休息，是为了要走更长远的路！? Bah. Crap. Brain's really malfunctioning. I used to give people the -_- look when they say that line. Now, I'm the one who's saying it. I think I just -need- to rot for a while. Period.
In fact, I think I will take a short nap now until dinner is ready. My dad takes hours to prepare his specialty bee hoon anyway.
Signing off... *collapse*
jOyZ blogged at 6:52 PM
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Friday, September 08, 2006
Thoughts On My Job
Hi there! I probably won't sound very pleasant at many points in this entry, but these are really my thoughts. I don't think I should even lie to myself, right? So if you think it's going to offend you - parents, pupils, fellow colleagues or maybe even my bosses - please don't read any further. =)
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It's good that the new GROW package for teachers recognizes that teachers need a time-out for rest and even professional development. I was quite glad to learn of the new Sabbatical Leave - but to only be eligible for that after 12 years of service is just too long a wait!
I mean, I need my Sabbatical Leave like next year?
-_-
I was just rambling on and on to Jocelyn about it via MSN and decided to just come here and blog my thoughts about it.
Why 12 years? I thought the word 'sabbath' is more related to the number 7? I mean Christians are supposedly to enjoy rest on the last (7th) day of the week, right? But of course, with the world getting so advanced in technology, everything has become a competition of the survival of the fittest... such that one doesn't necessary have to rest on a Sunday. Still, it should average out to approximately every 7 days, right? Hah. Okay, maybe I'm being too simplistic here. But the question is... WHY 12 YEARS???
-_-
Honestly, after working as a teacher for coming to 6 years, the pay really isn't THAT fantastic. Yeah, I know - our salaries are supposedly quite competitive (as they always say) compared to other professions in the private sector. But personally, even though I do need the money to satisfy my worldly desires and to further my studies, it's still not my top-most priority when it comes to the job.
When I first came into teaching, I was concerned about whether I could prepare a good lesson for my pupils everyday. I was, you could say, only concerned whether my pupils would leave my class learning at least something new. Even it was just ONE thing, I was happy. I took pains to prepare a good lesson (the best I could) even after all the crazy marking hours (I survived only on 3 hours of sleep everyday for the first 3 yrs of my teaching career). Of course the lessons planned didn't turn out well all the time, but I learnt to adapt and think on my feet, and most importantly how to help as many pupils I as could during that one particular lesson to learn SOMETHING.
Unfortunately, I just couldn't survive on 3 hours of sleep everyday during the first 3 years. I became very bad tempered. Haha... ask any of my ex 1E/2E (2001-2002) pupils and they can tell you everything. Go ahead, I have nothing to hide. I did what I thought was best under those circumstances and mental condition (remember here that I lacked of rest big time). I decided not to put my own health at stake from 2003 onwards, so somethings had to go when I needed more hours of sleep. I could never catch up with my marking - even on certain nights when I really didn't sleep a wink just to try to finish everything.
In the meantime, the world of advanced technology dictated that teachers ought to become multi-taskers, multi-faceted role models - whatever the names used to esteem us, we were supposed to be THE teacher, THE parent, THE friend (whom some pupils do not know how to properly respect because they don't even know how to respect their own friends of the same age), THE counsellor, THE administrator, THE manager, THE ROLE MODEL.
No wonder it's such a 'noble' job and even though the pay is relatively competitive to those of other jobs in the private sector, it's still meagre. Just look at how MULTI-faceted we are. WOO!
(Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that I want or do not want a pay increment. What I'm saying here is PLEASE STOP SAYING TEACHERS EARN A LOT!)
Many can argue saying that all jobs are like that now - private sector or not. I fully agree. But do you have one profession that demands so extensively AND intensively of you 24/7? The closest I can think of are those in the medical profession - because there could be life-and-death situations involved. And we're not talking about the lives of the doctors and nurses themselves here... they are actually responsible for the lives of their patients... just like teachers for their pupils. Do you know how stressful that is? It's like you can't even misbehave just for that split second even when you're out of school.
Exhausting job in all aspects - yes - even financial. We end up paying for some of our pupils' examination fees or what not sometimes.
I probably should be prepared for all this when I came into teaching. But where is the support? We need support and solutions that attack the root of the problem. Not just carrots to dangle in front of our noses to bind us to the job - while we continue to remain grouchy and pissed. It's no wonder teachers are a complainy lot and we don't necessarily make the best kinds of students ourselves when we attend courses. Imagine what kind of impact we've been having on our pupils. Oh yeah, maybe there have been more positive than negatives ones - I honestly don't know. But why should we even allow such negative impacts to exist in the first place?
You could say we are all adults and we should know better how to conduct ourselves and discipline our negative thinking away and smile and laugh plus what not all the time. Uh, I'm sorry - but we're really not robo-dogs?
You know what I hope to see?
1) Optional Professional Development Leave (PDL) every 5 years in any field of study we are interested in - even if it's NOT related to our teaching subject(s). What the heck, everything is relevant these days especially when you talk about educating the young ones. Schools are supposed to be that safe window to show the pupils a glimpse (or more) of the outside world. Otherwise, how do teachers remain relevant and interesting (or even interested for that matter)?
2) Optional Sabbatical Leave every 6 years. If teachers can continue teaching after the 6 years, fine and dandy, please just go ahead. If not, take a break. It would be good if we could have some choices, say, 3 months, 6 months, 9 months or a year. What we do during this period of time is really up to us - as long as it doesn't break the law or any regulations of the ministry? We could travel or even use our PDL during this period of time?
3) Minimal amount of administrative duties. Honestly, if I'd wanted to spearhead any projects or collect money for payment of textbooks and what not, I'd have become an event coordinator or a banker. I'm not saying that it's not good for teachers to be involved in all these - after all it will be most beneficial for our portfolio lest we wish to quit teaching one day and try other kinds of jobs. What I'm saying is whatever administrative responsibilities we are going to be given should not overshadow nor overwhelm our first basic responsibility and ability to teach in class. I think we owe the pupils that much - especially for those who come from unhappy or broken families. The school can be that one happy place they look forward to come to every day. Imagine the number of drop-outs from schools decreasing at an exponential rate. I'm sure that's one thing we really want to see happening.
And so, yes... it all boils down to the following.
4) Recruitment of worthy beings into the education system. Worthy beings in this case are defined as humans who are really not interested in climbing up the career ladder, pretending only to have the interest of the pupils at heart. Okay, I'm probably being too unreasonable here. After all teachers are humans and we do have our own lives, sanity and priorities in life to keep. We can't very well sell our lives to education, though I suspect many of us already have. Still, we ought to have a certain amount of selflessness, though not an overdosage - unless we ourselves do not mind dying a martyr or something.
5) Recruitment of a team of beings to specialize in administrative duties. Let's face it. Hiring just ONE CCPE (or whatever title we give them depending on the job aspect) isn't really enough if teachers are still being overwhelmed by administrative duties. Maybe we really do need a team which can handle majority of the administrative duties and market the school or something - since branding is so important nowadays, I suppose we could have a team of employees to market the school? Oh yes... it all boils down to MONEY again... Ah well, just a crazy idea.
Anyway, honestly, if I have maximum support and backing from 'up there', and knowing that I'm valued and appreciated (not just through the use of words and monetary rewards), what would I not do?
Haha... that's for me to know and for you to find out.
jOyZ blogged at 12:33 PM
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Friday, September 01, 2006
To Friends & Colleagues: Happy Teachers' Day
I woke up at a sinfully late time: 11.25am. It's not often that teachers get to wake up this late. I know - that doesn't mean it's right to do it. =O
Haha. Anyway, I slept late in the wee hours of this morning, so I needed that 9 hours of snooze. ;p
I had an enjoyable time during yesterday's celebration in school. Some of the ex-pupils (Reynold, Jiaming, Jieyong, Eugene Koh, Darwin, Aloysius, Unchi, Jiayun, Junkai, Waiyeen, Jessica... oh dear, have I missed out anyone?) came back and I had a great time catching up with them - a lot of lamenting over our present predicaments peppered with mirthful laughter throughout! I wish we had more time to chat though. I really miss everyone. A few more came a little later - Pikie, Kuan Loong, Kelvin, Selwyn, Candice, John (who rushed down from his RSAF session) and quite a number of the 4NT ex-pupils, some of whom I haven't seen in two years! Oh gosh, how much they've matured and changed.
I think nothing beats seeing ex-pupils returning to visit their teachers. It wasn't the presents or cards honestly. It was the company. =)
I'm sorry I couldn't catch up with everyone who came back. This year was a bit different than the past - we had a Teachers' Day lunch instead of the usual 'gala' dinner. Hence, the entire staff had to leave school by 11 plus to reach the lunch venue by noon - a lot earlier than previous years when some ex-pupils could come back a little later and still see some teachers who stayed back late enough. In any case, I thank all who made the time and effort to come down to visit the teachers.
To my ex-5Babies (2005): I'm so glad to hear most of you doing so well at the polytechnics and JC (Waiyeen!). To those of you who are having a difficult time and feel that sometimes you've made the wrong choice, press on! I know it's easier said than done - but sometimes it's really not a matter of choice. We just have to grit our teeth and drag ourselves up again to go on. It's not a good feeling, especially if there's seemingly no support. (Not everyone will have the luxury of having that special someone or bunch of friends all the time to make the difficult moments easier to bear.) So it's really important to take some time out to sit and reflect so that you can assess whether you're been happy enough to move on or make changes in your plans so that you will be happier.
I should know that better than anyone because it has been a really rough year for me. It doesn't seem to end, you know. Honestly, I can't wait for it to end. Haha...
I was reading one of the links on Zhen'ai's blog. It belongs to a fellow colleague from another school. I don't know him. But I am able to identify with how he feels about teaching and Teachers' Day. I'm sure many teachers in Singapore can too.
Yesterday's celebration started well enough. For once, majority of the student body gave it their all in the ACES Dance Competition. I must say, it was a good idea that a mere ACES Day workout was turned into a dance competition. Most pupils loved it. Even the ex-pupils who returned complained that they didn't have the luck to experience it during their years in their alma mater. Honestly - as cliche as it may sound - I felt the classes who performed were already winners in their own right. Your enthusiasm really amazed the teachers. We knew you were capable of such zeal. But if only you apply such zest into your academic subjects - how well you can and will do in all your tests and examinations!
And not to mention the class spirit that was present - it was electrifying. I think this is what everyone (teachers and pupils alike) would like to see during Sports Day. I remember we didn't have Houses back in my time at Crescent. Pupils represented their own classes and the mood during Sports Day, Swimming carnival and many school activities was fantastic. There was great cohesiveness when the girls cheered for their class representatives - all these helped in building a strong class spirit and eventually the school spirit. Ah, I really miss those crazy days - being a student again.
To my form class 4B: My only regret was that I wasn't able to perform with you. Honestly, when I saw you on the dance floor with all the moves, I wished I could have shown my support that would have better complimented all your hard work. If not for my injured ankle, I would have most certainly done all the steps you came up with. Well, like I said, it's not the winning. No doubt there were some of you who put in a lot more effort than others (haha... I could tell when I watched the whole class practised), but I think what really counted was that you had fun amidst the frustration and perspiration. Yesterday, what I saw was all of you having fun together as a class during the competition. It was the best performance you presented compared to all the practices during PE. And this is something I'm proud of y'all. My wish for you for the rest of the year is to see all of you continuing in this spirit, working together towards the O-level. Don't let the fun in learning stop now that the ACES Dance Competition is over. =)
Oh, I must not forget my brother, aka Mr Congeniality 2006 of River Valley Primary School, who's at the moment working very hard with his pupils for the upcoming robotics competition - even though it's Teachers' Day today. Yo Bro, welcome to the real teaching world! WAHAHAHHAHAAH!
It was a pity that the celebration didn't quite end on a pleasant note. I'm not quite sure what was the exact cause, but... we'll see what happens next.
Anyway, pleasant note or not, let this be a day of well-deserved rest for all Primary to JC teachers in Singapore. And if you happen to be a non-MOE personnel who is also in the teaching business and who happens to read my blog, kudos to your efforts too.
Let's just enjoy the holiday. (Even as I'm typing this, I spot - out of the corner of my eye - the 20-cm-high stack of marking I have to complete this September break.) X_X
jOyZ blogged at 11:31 AM
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